WHEN ARE TOO MANY KNIVES TOO MANY?

There is a school of thought that says two is one and one is none. I first heard this from the movie G.I. Jane. It may be a movie, but since I seriously got into the knife collecting and survivalist culture I realized that a lot of experts and sources actually advocate this kind of thinking.

Another school of thought that I crossed was that your tactical knife should not be your utility knife. There are two major reasons given for this: a) tactical knives are sometimes near impossible to use in a utility function, and b) utility knives get beat up a lot and tend to be abused, something you don’t want to do to a knife that is designated as the one to save your life.

Now obviously we are talking about urban survival and suburban living here so the other outdoor school of the hunting knife as “the one knife” cannot hold true. If we could all carry around ten inch knives in the city and to work, then we wouldn’t have to worry too much now do we.

As I don’t think anyone can argue that a big knife like a bowie or machete can serve both as survival and tactical quite easily. Though a secondary back-up smaller survival knife like a Becker Necker or a RAT Izula, sorry ESEE Izula, would be a great idea my frontiersmen friends. Just in case right?

So based on that, how many knives should one carry? Five.

Okay, so that may be too many for some, but please understand that I am not asking you to tote five swords. When I said knives I meant just that, knives. But each of these must be able to back-up the other and perform specific duties and back those up as well.

I am no expert and I did not claim to be. But I am just speaking plainly here. Based on the school of two is one and one is none, and the school of thought that a tactical knife is not a utility knife, five would be the minimum on your person.
Here is a breakdown of the five. One tactical, its back-up and a hold-out. One utility, its back-up and a hold-out. Obviously the hold-out for both can be one knife, thus five.

Also, it is suggested that your knife must be able to do the following in a pinch: light pry, strike a flint, food prep, do woodwork, cut light wire, turn screws, be used as a spear tip, be used as a hammer.

Since we have five knives, you can spread these needed abilities among them. So, based on the extra requirements, we need the following knives: a flat long fixed blade, an uncoated blade, a straight edge, one that can handle batoning, one that has steel that can cut copper wires, a thin spine, a fat blade, a flat strong handle.

This is where it becomes obvious why hunters use what they carry. One good knife can do all of these.

As an example, here is my TO&E on my person every time I go out. A fixed blade four inch kwaiken in a kydex sheath in my boot by Lucas Burnley in D2 steel, a Spyderco Tenacious with combi-edge, a SAK Classic attached to my single LED AA flashlight with a key ring, a Spyderco Bug in a small pocket in my cellphone pouch, a S&W Tactical Pen.

To round it out, I also carry a Zippo, and a disposable lighter. In my bag is a basic survival tin, and a multi-tool. To augment, if the security situation allows it, I also carry a Cold Steel Kobun. More on that next time.

R.I.P. LOLA GENIA

Return this woman to Huma's breast beyond the wild, impartial skies; grant to her a warrior's rest and set the last spark of her eyes free from the smothering clouds of wars upon the torches of the stars. Let the last surge of her breath take refuge in the cradling air above the dreams of ravens where only the hawk remembers death. Then let her shade to Huma rise beyond the wild, impartial skies.

GIANT MONSTER CROCODILE VS LITTLE GIRL

You see it isn't everyday you get news like this. A 10-Year old girl was attacked and decapitated by a monster crocodile in Agusan del Sur. Her sled/boat was knocked over by a the crocodile and it attacked her. Her decapitated body washed ashore two days later. God rest her soul.

The news sources vary about the creature. It's either salt-water or fresh water, because one says its the Agusan Marsh, the other says its Mihaba Lake. It's length ranges from 7 meters to 9 meters depending on who you're reading. The point is, this is a daily fact in the Philippines--one minute you are enjoying the water, the next, you're lunch to croczilla.

Anyone who has ever had seafood from the Southern Philippines, knows things there get much larger than here up North. But those who think it's a hoax, here's video proof, the specimen here is only 6 meters long...

THREE ANTE MERIDIEM

ITS 3 AM. I must be lonely. Yeah, that must be it. I am simply lonely because of the time. Let us not consider the little aches and pains that I feel. Let us not take into account the pining I feel for you or the thousand knives in my shattered heart.

Nope, let's not consider my melodrama or my illusions. Let us all pretend that I do not feel this way. After all, it is futile for me to try and talk to anyone about it as I do not have friends. I have a lot of colleagues and work-mates, but that's about it.

It's not your fault, don't worry, I won't blame you. After all, it's me. It's all me. I choose to say these things, I choose to act this way. I choose to be this. Sounds selfish? Sounds wrong? Truth usually is.

It's always been that way you know. Everytime I see you my world just flips. Why did you never want me? Why did you never give me that time of day? Why did you choose him over me? Why are you so...

I saw you sitting at your office, you were wearing this fuschia blouse. You were always beautiful, no matter what you wore. Even if it was a simple white shirt and a blue skirt with cheap flip-flops. To what sophistication you were wearing today...You were beautiful.

Too bad for me that you have a happy life.

MY CHINESE NEW YEARS RESOLUTION

This is one of those rare times that I actually have a resolution that I am going to do. Well, for a few years now I have decided to finally be serious about my resolution about losing weight when I realized that most of my clothes don't fit anymore. So now that after three years I have lost 24 pounds, I decided to add another resolution aside from losing weight. I have made the resolution that I will take my writing seriously. Not that I didn't take my writing seriously then, but now I will not let a day pass that I did not write something. The least acceptable is in the daily entry journal I keep again, something I have not done even before the beginning of the millenium, and no maximum. I have decided that I will maintain three blogs from the 16 or 17 I thought of maintaining at the end of last year, and that I will not allow this year to end without at least one of my short stories being published somewhere.

It is more of finally considering my career as more than just the freelancing that I do. It's also more than making money, as I resolutely said that I will not think of the money anymore, if it comes, it does. If it doesn't then it doesn't. What is important is that I write, that I leave volumes of work before I die, that I become a master of what the fates have decided to be my curse. That I find the Zen of writing, be it electronically or even by pencil or pen. It doesn't matter. From now on I write whenever I feel like it. Tapos!

The reason being at the end of last year I actually looked at my blogs and I thought, how pathetic they looked. Then it struck me how I kept waiting for someone to pay me before I wrote anything. I decided that this isn't a good deal. If no one came forth to pay me for it, then I would have no legacy whatsoever. So here we are. I am building, I am making, I am creating. Hopefully, someday, my children at least will benefit from this endeavor of mine. I for one am like a Japanese craftsman now, endeavoring to find perfection in imperfection. Shigata ga nai.

QCSHS MALCONTENTS

Here we go again. Students from QCSHS spoke out against what they perceived as the stupidity and inefficiency of those who are in power because they are older than them. Those in authority, because they are in authority deemed that these "kids" cannot speak out because they are too young to know what they are talking about and proceeded to suspend them for ten-days. Huzzah! For freedom of speech! Huzzah! For truth from the mouth of babes! Huzzah! For democracy!

This little issue right smacks the side of my heart having been ejected from Miriam College coming to fourteen years to the day now. Funny how fourteen years later history has come back to rear it's ugly head. Since the law, the Campus Journalism Act, that was supposed to protect student journalists like myself then is as effective as a gauze condom, I found myself having had to begin my career in Professional Journalism a year and a half earlier than expected. For that I would sincerely like to thank those who penned this "mighty law" that will protect the "right to free speech" of young journalists. Please note the dripping sarcasm in my tone if you missed it.

So forward fourteen years later where in a blog, a personal one at that, these student journalists wrote their opinion of a person. True, it was on the social networking site of Multiply.Com which makes it as private as a Wall Urinal. So in short it skirts the issues of libel and slander. Again we are faced with a dilemma. Is posting in a blog considered public? Is posting in a blog considered personal? As far as the law is concerned, and this does not apply to electronic forms of media, because the law is still sadly trying to keep pace with the speed of technology here: libel is printing something false about a person or organization that is available for public viewing. Slander is saying something false about a person or organization.

The thing here is, what if it is the opinion of the person? Well according to our favorite lawyer, it does not excuse you from libel or slander. You should really keep your opinions to yourself, unless you can defend yourself by skirting the law on libel and slander which are very specific, and if even one of the "aspects" of the law is not fulfilled, libel and slander do not count.

Now I am not about to preach about law here, I am not a lawyer, I am a journalist, or so I believe, so I will expound on the truth. The truth here is that students have voiced their mounting dissatisfaction about the knowledge and treatment that they receive at their learning institution. They were dismissed for speaking out their dissent about said service rendered by their teachers and administrators. The question is, are they not allowed to voice their discontent on a service that they have paid for? Is that not the way to go about it, voice your discontent and hopefully, the place will do its best to improve itself. But instead of going the positive way, the establishment considered the critics as malcontents and did away with them in a draconian fashion. Is this what we wish to teach our children when someday they become the ones in charge?

Unfortunately, what was true fourteen years ago is still true until now. Those who complain in this country usually are branded rebels and are summarily exiled or worse. Malcontents are not welcome in the Philippines.

THE AUSTRALIAN WAY

A Filipino lost his job at an Australian company. He was fired for his unhygienic practice of not cleaning his butt, after taking a poop, "The Australian Way" -- according to his immediate boss. His boss stopped him from bringing a bottle of water into the cubicle. The argument got heated and the Filipino said something along the lines of 'if you won't let me poop my way then you better fire me then.' So he got sacked.

The bottle of water you see is for cleaning his butt, because we Filipinos usually wash ourselves with soap and water, instead of wiping it with a piece of scented tissue. Which is the practice in most of the world; it being the norm and not the exception. That's why we don't know what a "skid mark" is. Unless we have hemorrhoids or an "accident." You know, getting a bonus while making-utot. (Fart darling.) It's another arrogant western belief that the western way is the "normal" way. Like sitting on the throne when most of the planet squat, which studies reveal as the "biologically correct" way.

Personally, I think he deserves to be fired, being a Filipino myself I am ashamed of his actions and his demeanor. Nakakahiya! He should have been deferential to his boss. After all, it is his company, and it is in his country. He was the guest, and should have acted like the good bisita.

If his boss doesn't like the way he cleaned his pwet then he could have let his boss show him how "The Australian Way" was done. He could have done his number two then afterwards screamed, paged, or called his boss to enlighten him how "The Australian Way" of cleaning poop off one's ass was done by letting his boss do it for him.

"Ser! Ser! Ay em dan meyking-tae! Flis tiths mi da Estrelyan Wey!"

("Sir! I'm done! Can you please come in here and show me how it is done 'The Australian Way' by wiping my ass for me.")

We really should tell our overseas workers to be more cooperative to their superiors, on the other hand. Maybe our kababayan could have let his boss take a dump and then calling all the other Filipinos who might also need to know how "The Australian Way" is done, hold a public showing of it. Maybe a manual can be made and have it included in the company orientation for future Filipino employees.

Better yet, maybe take a video and post it on YouTube so that everyone who would wish to learn can find out how "The Australian Way" is done and implement it in their own companies, or their government's hygiene program.

Maybe the root of all evil on the planet is because we do not clean the feces on our anus "The Australian Way." I have to ask my Australian friends about this, maybe we were just ignoring it all along, not knowing what a boon we had just smeared under our seats.

Maybe this "Australian Way" could be the solution to the problems in Afghanistan! Or Iraq! Or Somalia! Or in Haiti! Or in Sri Lanka! Maybe after solving the crisis in Mindanao in our own country "The Australian Way" could solve the problems in the only other country in the world with a longer war than ours--Sudan!

Our Filipino worker should be immediately deported and be re-educated in diplomacy. Filipino workers should learn to blend in the cultures that they work in. We do it so well everywhere else, this one Filipino worker must have been having a bad day and forgot his Filipino Manners. Que horror! Cinverguenza!

I feel I must apologize to our Filipino's immediate boss: I'm sorry our kabayan didn't let you teach him the error of his ways. Please don't give up on us we are not all like him. To prove it, we would be glad to have you visit our country and you can wipe all our asses until you are sure we have learned "The Australian Way" of doing it. Av a Geh deyh meyht.

The lawyers say that what happened was absurd. I agree. It is absurd. But then again, who ever said this world was a serious place?